Unsilenced: One Woman’s Fight to Right the Wrongs of Injustice and Give Sexual Assault Victims and Survivors Hope
Witlee became a Victim Advocate after becoming a crime victim of domestic and sexual violence. In 2018, Witlee was recognized by ACA Event Solutions for her advocacy work in the fight to end Domestic Violence in NC and she received their highest recognition, the Pearl Award.
Witlee has overcome tremendous adversities and insurmountable obstacles. But it is because of her unwavering faith, resilient hope, and her determination to never give up that has helped her to overcome and accomplish all that she has. Witlee has taken the injustices that she has endured and is using it to give others hope, focusing her advocacy on spreading awareness, educating others, and crime prevention. Her legislative reform is about creating a positive change throughout the world as she continues to advocate for the protection of women and children everywhere.
This is my story of how I went from victim to survivor, became a victim advocate for legislative reform, working tirelessly to give other victims and survivors hope. My work involves advocating to right the wrongs of injustice while trying to set new legal precedents that would protect the rights of victims and survivors, while also protecting all women and children. My story began on Jan 6, 2020, when I went on a date with a man I had met on a dating site. That date would forever alter my life. For over 10 hours, he held me hostage and repeatedly physically and sexually assaulted me. Though what I endured was unfathomable, the aftermath of what I’d experienced is incomprehensible.
I knew that “he said, she said” is what police default to any time a victim comes forward to report sexual assault. But I didn’t know what “she said, he sued” meant until it happened to me. Most people are unaware that after the #MeToo movement in 2017, some abusers started suing their victims out of retaliation for coming forward. This lawsuit has become known worldwide as “she said, he sued,” and abusers have been using it to weaponize the judicial system against victims to silence them.
Since being sexually assaulted in 2020, I’ve experienced one injustice after another including a lot of oppression throughout my case. I was forced to file bankruptcy because of my perpetrator’s “she said, he sued” lawsuit. But in spite of the judicial obstacles I faced, in Feb 2023, I won my case, pro se, meaning I represented myself in court without the assistance of an attorney. But even though my perpetrator’s DNA was found in my sexual assault kit, also known as a rape kit, and despite all the evidence against him, the police decided to close my case in April 2023, without ever bringing my perpetrator in for questioning. So, on April 25, 2023, I wrote a bill to prevent what happened to me from happening to anyone else. I started working with North Carolina legislators and the North Carolina Coalition Against Sexual Assault, which resulted in the bill drafting of my legislation on April 15, 2024.
In March 2025, I started lobbying and meeting with legislators at the North Carolina General Assembly. It was on April 3, 2025, that my bill on Sexual Assault Victim Rights was added to House Bill 771: Criminal Law Procedures and introduced before the NC House. On April 15, 2025, I spoke before the Judiciary 2 (J2) Committee meeting on my bill. After I spoke, the bill was unanimously passed by the J2 Committee. On April 28, 2025, my bill went before Rules and passed, which moved it back to the House floor to be voted on for the second and third (final) reading in the House. I was in the gallery during the House Session on April 29, 2025, when my bill was read and passed with 111 votes out of 114 votes.
Right after the passage of HB 771, the House Speaker announced, “ I have one more courtesy of the gallery that is part of the bill that the body just passed upon motion of Rep. Stevens, the Chair is happy to extend the courtesy of the gallery to Witlee Ethan who was an inspiration for portions of HB 771. If you’ll please stand and recognize her.” Members of the House and those in the gallery proceeded to give me a standing ovation, recognizing what I had achieved, a sexual assault victim becoming an advocate for others. By writing my bill, I was taking something very bad and using it for something good, to create much-needed change within our laws. As I stood there taking in this monumental moment, during Sexual Assault Awareness Month, I wasn’t just standing there for me. As I had stated two weeks prior in my speech before the J2 Committee, I was standing before the NC House representing every victim, every survivor, and every woman. I was standing up to advocate for every child. I’m not just fighting for justice for me but also for you!
Now that my bill has made crossover and is now in the Senate, it needs to pass the Senate to have a chance to go before Governor Stein for him to decide if he signs it into law. Only 10% of bills filed ever go before the floor and only 2% of all bills filed are signed into law. During this 2025 Session over 1,700 bills were filed in North Carolina. For this bill to get this far the first time it was introduced is a huge accomplishment. What happened to me could have easily destroyed me and it almost did. But I never gave up and I kept pushing through to survive and overcome this
Even though there are numerous injustices that my story exposes, it’s also a testament to resilience and perseverance in the face of tremendous adversity. Because no matter what I’ve faced, I continue to rise and prevail. By sharing my story, I hope other victims and survivors will know they are not alone and that they too can also persevere. Violence thrives in silence. Don’t underestimate the power of your voice. Abusers know how powerful our voices are, which is why they try so hard to silence us. Your voice is your greatest weapon, and you are your best advocate. Keep fighting for justice. Stand your ground. Break barriers. Speak up for positive change. Be unstoppable. Sharing our stories can empower and inspire others. Your voice can change the world.